Doctor Eamer

PAG-IBIG ATBP.

Girls Lang Ba ang May Ayaw sa ‘Uncertainties’?

owsiks_ok

Last Sunday, I met my college friends at SM Megamall. Medyo effort din sa part ko ang pagpunta doon since manggagaling pa ako sa Los Baños at saka parating na si Ruby (Typhoon Hagupit) ng mga panahong iyon kaya medyo delikado din magbyahe. Pero sabi ko nga sa FB post ko:

May mga taong handa mong bigyan ng oras (amidst the busy schedule), makasama lang sila;
May mga taong handa mong gawing “dahilan” at isantabi ang iyong mga “excuses,” makita lang sila; at
May mga taong handa mong ipaglaban against the typhoon (hello there Ruby!), mapuntahan lang sila.

We call ourselves Batch 06 (Owsiks) because that’s the start of our student numbers in college (2006-xxxxx). We entered UPLB way back 2006. We were part of a recognized student organization back then. Madaming memories na masarap balik balikan. Siguro mga once or twice a year na lang kami nagkakasama-sama since busy na din sa kanya-kanyang personal na buhay at trabaho.

Nagdinner kami sa Peri-Peri (click the link!). Ang sarap ng chicken nila! (Sana mabasa ito ng manager ng Peri-Peri sa SM Megamall para may discount ako next time.haha hashtag: foodblogger). Dahil hindi nakuntento sa pagkain, nagkape naman kami sa Coffee Bean (click the link again!).

Nagkamustahan. Nagkwentuhan. Nagtawanan. Nagbiruan. Nag-hot-seat-an. Nagkaalaman. Nagtuksukan. Nagkutsabahan. Nagkatanungan. Nagkagatungan.  At siyempre nagpicturan! Yun ang mga ginawa namin.hehe I love my batch! 🙂

Haba naman ng intro ko.haha Naisip ko lang i-blog ang topic na ito kasi napasama sa usapan namin. So magbibigay lang din ako ng aking pansariling pananaw. I accept violent reactions.hehe (Sanay kaming mga bloggers sa ganyan!haha)

So ano ba ang tinatawag na uncertainties sa isang relationship context? I’ll make it simple but I hope we are on the same page.hehe

  • Girl: Magkatext tayo. Umaga. Tanghali. Gabi. Anong meron sa atin? Hindi ka naman nagsasabi kung gusto mo ako. Uncertainties.
  • Girl: Bakit ba panay ang like mo sa pictures ko? Lagi ka din nagko-comment. Assuming lang ba ako? Uncertainties.
  • Girl: May plano ka bang ligawan ako or sadyang maganda lang talaga ang pakikitungo mo sa akin? Uncertainties.
  • Girl: May nagbabalak manligaw sa akin sa office. Lagi siyang nagpaparamdam na may gusto siya sa akin pero gusto kitang hintayin. Ano ba plan mo kasi? Uncertainties.
  • Girl: Nasa tamang edad na naman ako para pumasok sa isang relasyon, bakit di ka pa nanliligaw? Ano pa ba ng kailangan nating hintayin? Uncertainties.
  • Girl: Ito ba ng tinatawag na friendzone? Mas ok pa ata na huwag mo na lang akong kaibiganin kung wala din naman tayong happy ending (Rhyme!). Uncertainties.
  • Girl: Lalaki ka kasi. May expiration din ang matres namin. So ano na? Hobby mo lang akong i-date? Uncertainties.

Di ko alam if naka-relate ka. Pero for sure may makaka-relate dun sa pitong bullets na yun!hehe Sige sasagutin ko din ng pitong bullets yan.hehe

  • Boy: Ganoon lang talaga personality ko. Palakaibigan. I want to connect to people. Sana ‘wag mong bigyan ng meaning ang mga sobrang texts ko sayo.
  • Boy: Bakit ka pa nagpost kung hindi mo din inaasahan na may mag-lilike? Ako lang ba ng nag-like? Madami naman kami ah. Pag nag-like, may gusto agad? Di ba pwedeng encouragement lang? (Ay wala pang naglilike sa picture niya. Ok naman ah. Sige na nga, ililike ko na.)
  • Boy: Kapag hindi maganda ang pakikitungo namin sa inyo sasabihin niyo ang suplado namin or hindi namamansin. Tapos pag pinansin namin kayo at maganda kami makitungo, may meaning pa din. Ano ba talaga ate? 🙂
  • Boy: Wala naman nagsabi na hintayin mo ako ah. Pero kung tayo talaga ang tinadhana ng Lord, kung may manligaw man sayo, malalaman mo naman iyon sa courtship process kung kayo talaga. I mean, the compatibility, the call, the career and the future. Pero siyempre, kung mahihintay mo ako, magagalak ako. 🙂
  • Boy: So dahil nasa tamang edad kana, ganoon na lang yun? Pressured din naman ako ah. Gusto ko lang naman maibigay ang best para sa iyo in the future. Yung i-date ka sa awesome na lugar. Yung tipong pag nag-propose na ako sayo, kasama na dun yun “business proposal”.hehe
  • Boy: Yan ang hirap sayo eh. Nakikipagkaibigan lang ako pero nag-eexcpect ka agad. Di ba pwedeng magkaroon tayo ng “healthy friendship”? Then tingnan natin if mag-work, we can level up. 🙂
  • Concern din naman ako sa future capacity mo to give birth. Pero di ka ba naniniwala sa “faith”? Yung asawa nga ni Abraham 90+ na nanganak pa din. Because they had faith.

Alam ko sari-sari ang mga naiisip niyong reactions.hehe Bring it on, at least we can share both sides of the story.

As for me, naniniwala ako sa “Destiny.” Hindi dahil madami na akong napanood na movies about love stories but I personally knew a lot of couples na naniwala at naghintay. I can’t say that they all have a “happy ending” but I can assure that they have a “better ending.” Kita naman kung paano nila hinahandle yung pamilya nila. At kung paano nila pinapalaki ang mga anak nila. Kung naniniwala ka sa forever, dapat hindi ka naniniwala sa happy ending. Dahil ang forever, walang ending. (Saan galing yun?lol!haha)

Huwag kung anu-ano ang iniisip. Huwag masyadong mag-isip ng kwentong pag-ibig! Eto ang isipin mo: “… whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things. Sabi yan ng kaibigan kong si Paul! 😉

Photo Credits (here)

uncertainties_ok

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53 comments on “Girls Lang Ba ang May Ayaw sa ‘Uncertainties’?

  1. slickmasterofthephilippines
    December 18, 2014

    Ayaw ko na makisali sa matinding debate ukol sa pag-ibig, assurance man yan, friendzone o kung anu-anong kachurvahan. O siguro, hindi na ako gaya ng dati na kaya pang makipagbarahan sa mga babae dahil una sa lahat noon ay hindi ako ganun kaemosyonal na tao, pangalawa, hindi ako nainiwala sa romantisismo, at pangatlo, hindi ako naniniwala sa “destiny.” (actually, yung pangatlo ay totoo pa rin sa akin)

    Pero alam mo, sa lumang panahon (luma talaga?), pareho tayo ng pagtingin sa kilos ng ilang mga babae na binanggit mo dito.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. chevybo
    December 17, 2014

    Nakaktuwa yung palitan nang komento, makikigulo na rin ako sa “puwede pa kami” portion mo ha? Para sa aking, dipende yan sa perspective at intensyon nang taong directly involved. Mapa lalaki man yan o babae. Sabi nga nila, “Kung ayaw may dahilan, kung gusto palaging paraan” dagdagan mo pa ng kowt-en-kowt ni Kumpareng Bob “Kung maghihintay ka ng lalandi sayo, walang mangyayari sa buhay mo. Dapat lumandi ka rin!” haha, just a thought..

    Liked by 1 person

  3. David D'Angelo
    December 16, 2014

    Natawa naman ako dun sa mga sagot hahahaha basag na basag yung babae. Epic. Pero totoo naman di ba? Minsan assuming talaga ang iba xD

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Fernando Ceballos Lachica
    December 16, 2014

    I think it boils down to the financial status of people concerned. And, the readiness to be with somebody or a group. Why bother with uncertainties, look beyond the angle of your sight. Male and female are very different.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Carmel
    December 15, 2014

    In most cases, uncertainties suck. Period. Haha!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Mitch Ryan
    December 13, 2014

    Although I am the master of my fate and the captain of the soul, I still believe in destiny. No matter how much resistance, at the end of the day what/who is fated will find each other in one way or another.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Chef Jay
    December 13, 2014

    I think both genders don’t like a lot of uncertainty in life, but hey they say uncertainty is what makes life worth living. Uncertainty is just another word for ‘surprises’, which can either be positive or negative!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. troycabida
    December 12, 2014

    Thanks for the post! Kakamiss sa Pinas bigla :)) Patama yung FB status btw :)) Hope you’re well!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Doctor Eamer
      December 14, 2014

      Thanks Sir! 🙂 Yes po, my family and I were safe and sound. God bless po! Dalaw ka na lang po sa Pinas 🙂

      Like

  9. Marvin Carpio
    December 12, 2014

    ha ha ha! nice post…I know, first move ng mga lalaki yun showing a lot of care through text or whatever means just to show his care because he will not give his precious time to her for nothing di ba? So, wait ka na lang muna girl na talagang magsabi na siya sayo, maybe he is waiting for the perfect time to tell it or simply it is just his personality … 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Aileen
    December 11, 2014

    Haha! Great post! I saw the discussion about ‘destiny’ too; I also don’t believe in that. Not even soul mates. I think that it all matters by chance and if it’s the right time with that person–then it is. Sometimes it just doesn’t fit, so it doesn’t.

    And also, sometimes good acts are interpreted as flirtation or wooing efforts when it’s just kindness. Girls tend to overthink sometimes so… :)))

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Kim Z.
    December 10, 2014

    In my case, I don’t really believe in destiny. Pero I believe that God gives us whoever it is that we need (and not necessarily who we want). I know this may sound like I had just contradicted myself pero with the consequences from the string of actions & decisions we have made, I think yun pa din ang basis ng greater power kung sino yung hahayaan niyang mameet natin.

    I also think na pwedeng madaming tao sila pero it’s up to us on who we will choose to be with. So I guess it’s more like God lays down the paths and it’s up to us to choose one over the other? Parang “Choose your adventure” book na the possibility with each option will change depending on every decision we make. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Doctor Eamer
      December 10, 2014

      Yung ibig sabihin ko pala ng “destiny” ay.. God destined someone for me that will be part of my life in fulfilling His purposes in us as a couple. 🙂 Tama ka na it’s about our choices.:-) Our choices and decisions have a great impact to our future kaya we must be careful on the choices and decisions that we will make. 🙂 Thanks Kim! 🙂

      Like

  12. CaraPerez
    December 10, 2014

    minsan napaka unfair nito para sa babae, kasi si guy wala lang pero si girlie nag eexpect na. lalo na yung sobrang close na ganun.. so sana yung guy hinay hinay lang. at si girl huwag agad mag assume.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. CaraPerez
    December 10, 2014

    re: bakit kailangang ilike ang post ni girlie kung wala pang naglalike pero for the sake of liking a photo lang pala yung ginagawa mo?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Doctor Eamer
      December 10, 2014

      As I said extreme case ito. 🙂 The common case is that madami naman likes yung pic ni girl, so mataas lalo ang chance na makikita ni guy yung pics nya sa newsfeed. So i-lilike niya. Reason? It may vary depende sa tao. Pwede kasi na hobby niya lang talaga maglike ng pics ng fb friends niya. In such away, pag siya naman ang nagpost, madami din ang maglilike. Amanin man o hindi, there’s a desire in people to be noticed or to be belong.hehe 🙂

      Like

  14. Fe Zapanta
    December 10, 2014

    Applicable din naman sa dalawang gender ang ibang uncertainties. But its a great post, I liked it 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Doctor Eamer
      December 10, 2014

      Thanks! Yes it is applicable for both gender.hehe nagkataon lang na girl yung nag-open ng topic.hehe ginawan ko lang ng blog. 🙂

      Like

      • Fe Zapanta
        December 10, 2014

        Haha yeah .. It’s nice naman 🙂 Anyways, I’m still waiting for the 3rd part of akala ko sya na 😀

        Liked by 2 people

      • Doctor Eamer
        December 11, 2014

        Hehehe 🙂 coming soon 🙂 busy pa ako sa acads eh.hehe basta this December 🙂 thanks sa pagsubaybay.hehe

        Liked by 1 person

  15. shangdiana
    December 10, 2014

    Pwedeng vice versa yung bullets #1, #2 & #6 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Mia
    December 9, 2014

    This made me laugh! Totoo talaga guys and gals differ in perception lalo na sa relationship.I think mas okay if in the beginning ipaalam agad ang intention ni guy kahit maging awkward yung kalalabasan. Kasi kaming mga babae minsan we assume too much and what we perceive as friendly gestures may be misinterpreted into something more!

    Liked by 1 person

  17. CaraPerez
    December 9, 2014

    ang douche nung lalaki hahaha.. #paasa #pafall #conceited hahaha. ang sama niya.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Doctor Eamer
      December 10, 2014

      Case to case basis naman kasi.hehe depende sa situation talaga. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • CaraPerez
        December 10, 2014

        depende rin sa girl, oo. pero yung pov ni guy medyo harsh

        Liked by 1 person

      • Doctor Eamer
        December 10, 2014

        Extreme case naman kasi yung case that the guy is trying to portray. 🙂 but your comments are well noted. 🙂 #keepcalm 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • CaraPerez
        December 10, 2014

        yep, pero sana hindi lahat ng guys ganyan mag isip. hindi naman din kasi aasa si girlie kung hindi siya nagbibigay ng motibo.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Doctor Eamer
        December 10, 2014

        Dahil jan, gagawa ako ng counterpart nito. 🙂 side naman ng girl.hehe 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • CaraPerez
        December 10, 2014

        haha, pwede din. or mag tanong ka ng opinion ng iba’t ibang babae at lalaki about that situation

        Liked by 1 person

      • Doctor Eamer
        December 10, 2014

        Sure! I’ll pm you para manghingi ng opinion.hehe 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • CaraPerez
        December 10, 2014

        ako talaga? lol sana yung ibang nag comment din dito

        Liked by 1 person

      • Doctor Eamer
        December 10, 2014

        Lahat ng nagcomment dito. Ask ko.hehe 🙂

        Like

  18. belovedreg
    December 9, 2014

    Reaction regarding sa text thingy hehe. I think both girls and guys should be very careful. For me kasi possible na maging form of isolation yung texting. Di man personal na iniisolate ng 2 people yung mga sarili nila ,may emotion, time, etc. na naiinvest (lalo sa girls) kahit na mukha naman walang deeper meaning yung conversations ng 2 people. And we know how our hearts work (Jeremiah 17:9). Di naman masama pero ako po personally I always check, if I would still say yung mga tinetext ko given na sa personal kaming dalawa lang ang magkausap, and sa personal, would I spend ng ganitong kahaba kausap yung guy na to (na kami lang?!). Hehe.

    But in fairness, yung answer ng boy dito sa blog, I support it. Maybe kaya lang din maraming girls ang madalas nagaassume na may meaning every good thing na ginagawa sa kanila ng guys kasi chivalry is not that common nowadays. I know there are still lots of men na gentlemen pa rin, pero let us be honest, kumokonti na ang mga gentlemen. Kaya naman sa mga kuya na gentlemen pa rin kahit hindi lang sa friends nila, I salute you all. May your tribe increase. Hehe.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Doctor Eamer
      December 10, 2014

      Thanks sa support 🙂 lol!hehe yup papadami ako ng tribemates.hehe #discipleship

      Like

  19. Liberty S. Fontanilla
    December 9, 2014

    yung bullet 1 and 3 ng girl. tinatanong din ba yun ng boys?

    Liked by 1 person

  20. KimberlyTheBrave
    December 9, 2014

    Reaction to your reaction for bullet 1: eh bakit kasi sobra magtext? Ano ba laman ng text? Bakit nakikipagtext in the first place? Hanggang anong oras magkatext?

    Hahaha.call me idealistic kuya,pero for me kasi if you dont have any intentions to express something other than friendship,it won’t show (or manhid lang talaga ako.haha.I was told that I’m not really a woman,mentally and sometimes emotionally, speaking,which kinda hurts-kinda lang:).

    On a different note, yan ang isa sa weaknesses din ng women (I think:). Our hearts are so wired to long for pursuit (#GandangDestinyHugot!). Kaya ganun po siguro, may mag effort lang para sa kanila (sige na nga – samin:), hinahanapan na ng meaning.hehe.

    I love the last part tho! Totoo nga doc na masyado kasi natin (?) Naiisip ang mga bagay na yan. As I was able to share to some women of san pablo last sunday, focus na lang muna sa purpose at sa call. Turn idle moments of daydreaming into productive hours of working out your passion and pursuing your purpose. Di mo mamamalayan darating ka din sa puntong iyon 🙂

    Tama po ba doc? Thanks for posting this, this will help relieve other women of their confusions.haha.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Doctor Eamer
      December 10, 2014

      Re the first paragraph.. i forgot to mention that this is written in tge context of “professional setting” so time and the content of text may vary.hehe kung call center yung work.. depende sa shift yung time ng text.haha yung content, depende talaga.haha pwedeng invitation lagi sa networking event.. or insurance sales or work related.. or daily verse or GM or holiday greetings or qoutes or thread messages.hehe

      Tama ang mga kumento mo. Comments noted. 🙂

      Like

      • KimberlyTheBrave
        December 14, 2014

        Ah oo nga.haha.forgot about the time considerations, depende sa mga tao (whew, I need to get off the ‘students-pa-lahat’ thinking.haha.

        Liked by 1 person

  21. melancholicbutterfly
    December 9, 2014

    Bottomline: communicate. this is a one sided point of view. lol. Defensive na ang points pagdating sa boy. (end of comment) 😛

    Liked by 2 people

    • Doctor Eamer
      December 9, 2014

      hehehe! 🙂 that’s why we want to hear from you girls 🙂

      Like

    • mari anjeli
      December 9, 2014

      Gawan na yan ng side na si boy naman, pinupush na manligaw pero si girl alam niyang di pa time at di pa siya handa. 😉

      Liked by 2 people

    • Doctor Eamer
      December 10, 2014

      Pero sabi nga ni kate (according to a source), communication is not a cure-all 🙂

      Like

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This entry was posted on December 9, 2014 by in Love & Relationship and tagged , , , .
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